Someone (anonymous) asked me in that form thingie what my favorite kind of punishment is. I said “none”. I’ve never, ever gotten into the punishment game. That made it really hard to find the right kinky partner, to be honest. All these guys kept thinking I wanted to be “bad”, to get punished, spanked for being naughty.
Huh? That’s no fun. I totally like to be naughty, but not bad. And I certainly don’t want to get punished for behavior I’d rather have encouraged.
I remember when I first read something M. wrote, talking about not liking the punishment game, wanting to torture his property just because he thought that was, or because he was horny.
Ding, ding, ding! That’s what I was looking for. I’ve always thought sex was recreational, and I just couldn’t understand why kink couldn’t be the same thing. No, I wasn’t reliving some sort of childhood trauma, I was just horny and wanted a really hard spanking, please and thank you.
That’s what inspired me to write to him. Well, that and the thought of him bringing flowers home to someone kept naked, in collar and cuffs, “just because”. God, that was a long time ago.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
That is the true difference between being owned and playing a scene. I can torment my slave to my hearts content and she is not bad. I have punished her a few times in three years though. In each one she modified her behavior afterwards. I can tell you that there is a huge difference in my intent and the outcome I seek when I was punishing. It revolved around her health and taking care of herself. I gave her a pussy whipping that she cringes whenever she thinks about to this day. It is the mental and emotional differences. It is not hot for the Dom either. I much rather just torment her for my pleasure.
I totally get where you’re coming from here and completely agree. While there is punishment in our dynamic, it’s reserved for behavior modification… not play time.